Why dating is so seductive
Venn diagram: 1st circle: all the people you’re attracted to. 2nd circle: all the people who are attracted to you.
The circles overlap and there’s a tiny sliver of people to whom you’re attracted and to whom you’re attractIVE.
Then you get on a date with one of those in the sliver. And you enter a new set of values that could be deal breakers… personality, values, communication skills…
And if you get past that, then maybe, you even date a while.
And it’s good. The loneliness is gone. You have a S.O. You enjoy the benefits of being in a relationship.
But alas. It doesn’t work out.
“Sooooo close” you say.
Back to square one!
Psychologically, it’s identical to a gambling addiction. Intermittent reward. The chance at a reprieve to the existential threat of being alone is a dating app swipe away.