Roommate decided to go 200% devout Christian and asking for zero sleepovers and friends to be gone by 10pm so she can "fire" pray at midnight
My name and only my name is on the lease so I'm not too stressed but I'm annoyed.
I know her through family so kicking her out would make some interactions tricky.
I'm from a very Christian home and her parents are a-theist/agnostic. I believe she got the wrong impression of me. I'm somewhat Christian but I'm a philosphy and science nerd and I'm not a 'believer' in the way Africans are raised to be (I'm African).
I thought getting a roommate this year would be good for me, as I got very depressed last year (working remotely in tech so quite isolating) and I was on my own. I barely socialized and was neglecting excercise, something I'm fixing this year. I think she also didn't want to live alone for whatever reasons and couldn't afford her rent anymore and she proposed moving in with me. I also didn't think it through so that's on me.
I was setting some rules around noise because she is very loud. She wakes up at midnight, sometimes at 4am to pray very loudly and scream these declarations. "prayer warfare" she calls it. Then when she comes back from work all she listens to (on max volume) are these prophets and pastors and worship music. I bought earplugs but I can still hear her when she's screaming at 3/4am. The other noise like banging cupboards, cooking at odd hours I don't hear when I have my earplugs in. I asked that 11pm-6am be quiet time during the week. She's very new to this 'lifestyle' and I can see the patterns people I grew up with fell into, burnout, never having money because they have given it away etc. She also will pray condescending things like "remove the spirit of laziness" when I'm around, and that's because I say no to these prayer services she invites me to and choose my sleep.
I am a Pastor's kid and even my mom wasn't this intense. My sleep was never disturbed because she wanted to pray. When I proposed this rule, she was uncomfortable and she believes her angels or whatever are working and affecting the spirits attacking me. But I spoke to my (very christian) mom and she said it's against Christianity or whatever to behave like this.
Her rebutttal to my quiet time suggestion was that none of us could have sleepovers because "people carry demonic spirits she doesn't want in the house" and my friends must leave by 10pm. I honestly don't have many friends, but a friend of mine ( 6 year friendship) came over last week, heartbroken and we just chilled in my room, speaking (and she cried a bit) and ate ice cream, no sad music even. At 10pm my roommate texted me to remember to get my friend to leave before it was too late to Uber. I had briefly introduced them when she arrived, roommate was in the lounge and we went to my room. I texted back saying she drives and lives down the road.
My friend left at 11pm because she had an appointment in the morning, but honestly I wouldn't have minded her sleeping over or even leaving at 1am if that's what she needed. She let me stay in her apartment for a week when my lease to this current place was delayed and I was waiting to move in. No drama, just a good friend.
I'm currently single but that may change in the future. I want my boyfriend to be able to come over and like I said I'm not that devoted to Christian morals. I drink socially and I used to vape, quit for health reasons. I have started new hobbies and I'm building a community and mentally great me liked going to other friend's places for board game evenings or getting ready together to go out for drinks and would like to host once in a while. I don't go out clubbing anymore but not bc of Jesus but bc I have auditory and sensory issues. I have beautiful place in a beautiful city and I want to enjoy this season of my life.
I had one roommate in college and she was great! Only rules we had were about the bin and cleaning schedules. Always a heads up when a boyfriend would come over. We still keep in contact so I know my current situation is not the norm.
I played some hip hop loudly while cleaning on Sunday morning and she complained it was very loud and asked me to turn it down- yeah no shit. It's what I have to endure daily. She left after 10 minutes and came back in the evening. Under normal circumstances I would've worn earphones but I felt why? It's not reciprocated. She texted in the evening saying she would try to be mindful about noise
I'm saving up to buy my own home so splitting the rent is great and her "lease" ends at the end of the year. How to survive lol
Edit: Thanks guys! I've given her notice to move out. The shouting still continued after her text. I can comfortably afford the rent and have decided to live frugally until I have that down payment is saved up.
Also, I am the tenant on the paperwork, responsible for the place, rent and deposit I paid. My real estate agent knows about her and had only needed her ID for entry into the building, which he has emailed to change next month. Families stay in the building and as long as you don't exceed maximum occupants, they only care about the tenants($$).