Should I leave my friend?

Hi, So I have a pretty complicated situation and I am not sure what I should do, partly because I don't know and partly because I am afraid I don't have it in me to leave my friend.

So for you to understand me better, and why I am kinda stressed about it, I will tell you what happend and my testimony.

I was away, very away from God, yet I was a beliver i.e. I knew God existed, I knew he did had the power.

But I wasn't acting on that faith, I remeber I was mocking God by saying "i know I will go to hell".

Just before Jusus found me again I had strange fears during the nights, and one very strange encounter, when I was scrolling on tiktok in the bed i found this short black&white movie in which an old woman was constantly saying "let me in" in a very aggressive tone, this impacted me very much because when I was watching it I was in a stage of lethargy of some sorts, like I was concious but not to the full extent or something. Generally when I "woke up" I knew somwthing was very very much off about it and I kind of freaked out. I am sure, (like you don't know it but you feel it), that it might have been a start of something horryifing.

A very short time after my only friend showed me he was making his own fantasy world and told me that will be selling it. It gave me an idea to make my own world with my "own" mythology of false gods. Later I got an idea that I would build a p*rn game in this world and sell it or or get patreon. But when I first thought of making such a game I almost instantly thought that it would be a stupiest idea on the earth since I would be direct cause of sin and maybe condemnation of thousands of souls. If I remeber correctly I asked God that I shouldn't do this, and from this point on I have been born again in a very short amount of time.

All of this happend in a span of maybe two weeks. (But God was calling on me from a longer period of time, because I wanted to go to confession fo around 1-2 months at that time)

Jesus relieved me from racism, hate of other groups, cigarrets, porn, drunkenness(not alcoholism but drinking with intention of getting drunk with the said friend or very rarely alone).

Now this friend of mine does not believe in God or in Jesus the way a christian should, I dont want do go into details of his faith because I might write something wrong but for example when I said to him that Jesus is the one who relieved me from these sins and addictions he said something like "interesting, you can justify it like it if you must".

Later he wanted me to play with him in a strategic game where the main purpose is to summon the god from mythology of an ancient culture to win. I played the game with him trying to deafen a conviction from God that I shouldn't play this, I was saying that these are not real, these are pixels, it is just a game etc. (I was deafening such convictions multiple times). A couple of days later I was playing with him in another game and I was drinking strong alcohol , deafening the convictions again, saying to myself, it is okay, ita only one or two drinks, nothing happens etc.(even though I drank only two drinks I did got the Buzz, because again I most likely was drinking to be drunk again).

The same night I had a dream where I was holding a nearly closed glass doors with my hand but I wasn't closing it. Behind these doors there was something similar to a dog, it was very skinny with bones visible through the gray skin. While I was holding these doors half-opened, I saw as some energy brought this dog back to life and it started going at me, jumping at the door trying to get in, a second later if I remeber correctly the only thing I saw was an elongated awful face, like it was in flesh, blood and bones, but not quite yet, it is hard to explain. Then I woke up, but without fear, thinking of this weird dream. I thought of it as a warning from God of going back into the old ways of mine (deafening the convictions, drinking for the sole purpose of drinking etc).

So now that you know what has happend and what I came throigh, you will unserstand that I am afraid of going back to it, because I afraid it that if I separate myself from God, from Jesus again it will end up as possesion or I will make something that will condemn others and me in effect. Given that Bible says: Matthew 12:45 "Then goeth he, and taketh with himself seven other spirits more wicked than himself, and they enter in and dwell there; and the last state of that man is worse than the first."

So before Jesus found me again, when I was meeting with my friend we were drinking so that we would be drunk, we were eating in drunkenness and excess, making fun of others, and playing games(we had LAN partys, so making fun of others is meant as in internet/games).

A couple of days ago I met with him again, he accepted my change of hearth but did make comments implying that it is not a work of God in my heart but "psychology".

I tried to control drinking, and to some degree there was a success because I wasnt drunk and I didn't have any hangover. However I might have crossed the line because I cought myself on eating in excess and on laughing about things I shouldnt laugh. Other than that I also saw that I was kind of ashamed to be a bold christian and with my works I kind of "renounced" my faith in Christ. Because when he was showing me media where God's name was used in vain or where some people were mocked I didn't said anything, I was just silent. And I know I should have said "hey, this isn't funny/fine to me anymore because I am now follower of Christ", but I couldn't I was ashamed of my faith, scared of his reaction, shy.

I tried to talk about it with a priest during a confession two times, first before we met again, and on sunday after the meeting.

During the first confession the priest said that I should considier this relationship because maybe I am here to get him back to God.

During the second the priest said that when I will be among crows I will cow as them.

I also called another priest and asked him about this, and he said that maybe I should discuss it with him in detail(this change of my hearth)

Now since you know what is it about and why I am scared so much of being away from God again you may understand this a little bit better.

I am not sure what I should do about this friendship, I mean I kind of feel that I should end it yet I am unsure of that, and at the same time I feel powerless as If I was unable to do it because it is my only friend whom I know for 14 years.

And again on the other hand as I am thinking of leaving this friendship, i think that I wouldn't like to be left like that.

Ans If I should end this friendship, what should I tell him when we wanted to go on vacations together, or what should I tell him when he wants to meet?

As you see I am kind of mixed in all this and even my last question about what I should do is a little bit mixed up.

Even if someone says that I should end it, I don't know how, and if I wont and God wonts me to give up that friendship, then not giving it up will be going against God, I just feel lost, maybe the Holy Ghost will give me directions through someone.

God Bless You all who read this, may the Father, the Son and the Holy Ghost be with ypu and Guide ypu through your life to eternal life 🥰