Struggling badly with breakup

I’m spiralling so badly and i have pretty much 0 people round to help me and i have no distractions and my ex just wants space so she can think and wants me to show i can respect what she needs, i find it so hard because i just need her but i want to respect it badly. ive messaged her and i feel bad now because i feel like it will push her away more and i don’t know what to do, this post is a whole mess and ill probably delete it. i see her next week and im excited but the days go by so slow when i can’t speak to her. I don’t know what to do all day ive just been in a loop of numb and screaming