Does anyone else gaslight themselves into thinking they don't have BPD

Hi,

I got my diagnosis a few months ago. After many years of dealing with undiagnosed BPD. Almost 24/7, I find myself making excuses and finding ways to tell myself that my Doctor was wrong, and that I don't have BPD; or that it's not even real. I always look everything over again, symptoms and all to convice myself that I'm not dreaming, and that it's a real disorder that I have. But I genuinely can't escape this cycle

Does anyone else do this?