Should I join the military?

I’m 23 (man) and really want to join the military but 1) Don’t know which one. And 2) Every veteran and currently serving member tells me not to.

I want to join either the Irish army (because they accept EU citizens), the french foreign legion or the dutch army but don’t know which one. I don’t want to join my country’s military because the government is extremely corrupt and I don’t feel patriotic towards it at all.

I love the netherlands the most because I’ve lived there and loved it but don’t speak dutch so I’d have to learn it first but that would take at least a year and I feel like I’m getting a bit too old already. I heard the Irish army is super underpaid and the french foreign legion is kinda neglected and I don’t think I feel comfortable trusting some criminals with my life on the battlefield…

Any advice?